april

.........langfredag (easter) i've been working early til 3 pm it was nice and bit sunny in the morning and cloudy in the afternoon. a collegue from finland asked me if we could take a walk , sure i said. I live alone in this pensionhouse my swedish collegue just left monday and a german couple left last wednesday. I am totally alone in this big pensionhouse under my grieving time of loss. I dunno how tough it can be sometimes.
I am not into walking in Sweden esp. not in skåne as it is so boring and flat. But this friday afternoon me and a finnish collegue walked around 2 hrs and surprisingly I couldn't get enough of it and just want to continue. We walked longer and longer but then he said now we got to go back., who surrender I asked.

when we came back he went to his room in our working place where he live and fixed himself after the walk and came to my place (pensionhouse) brought the 3 liters box of red chilean wine.
we chat and drank, i drank 2 glasses of red wine....and every minute of our company during walk and the time we sat and drank Lito my brother is always in my head.

I am feeling better after all. I don't know if there's someone like me who cares so much for her brothers as I do., or is this a feeling of being the eldest of the family who took care of them in the early age while my mother was away making a living??

Rest in Peace for you pa, ma and Lito..I do my best to take care of my family and support jr. and zyra as i can. good night.